On Sun Sep 29, 2019 evening at Bently Reserve in San
Francisco financial district near the Embarcadero, we planned for multiple
ceremonies in sequence. It started with a Western ceremony officiated by
Patrick’s close friend Jack Madans. Then we had a Bengali ceremony which was
scripted and officiated by yours truly. Both ceremonies were non-religious. After
that we had a cocktail hour for the guests to mingle and take selfies with each
other and the newly-wed couple. Finally, it was topped by a dinner, speeches,
songs, and dances. There are a few highlights I would like to mention as a
commentary.
Getting Ready
Photo Shoot
Harrigan family with the couple
Basu and Harrigan families with the couple
The Western Wedding Ceremony
Slice of the audience - the bride's family
The procession of the bridesmaids, groomsmen and the siblings
Parents walking with the groom down the aisle
The flower girl Gunja, brides cousin
Instead of traditional father walking the daughter down the
aisle, here both Jaya and I walked Jayinee down the aisle. We both wore
traditional Bengali dresses – Saree for Jaya and Dhuti Panjabi for me.
Parents accompanying the bride...
...to walk down the aisle
Parents walking the bride down the aisle
The Western ceremony started with a wonderful introduction
by Jack. It was followed by emotional, heartfelt, and beautiful vows by Jayinee
and Patrick. At the end of the ceremony there were very few people with dry
eyes.
On Wed Sep 25, 2019 our family and friends gathered at our
home to arrange Tauttwo (তত্ত্ব) These
are the gifts from the bride’s parents to the bride, groom and groom’s family.
Traditionally these are arranged on large trays and sent to the groom’s house in
the morning of the wedding day. In addition to various clothes this often includes
various kind of food including Bengali sweets, fish, and fruits.
Tauttwo-1
Tauttwo-2
Tauttwo-3
On Fri Sep 27, 2019 evening my brother Sambit and my
sister-in-law Paramita threw the Aiburo-bhaat (আইবুড়ো
ভাত) for Jayinee. This
is like bridal shower but has additional significance being the last meal taken
by the bride made by her parents before the wedding. Babul-Paramita also
invited Patrick and his family to do the same for Patrick. It is amazing how Patrick’s
father Shane, mother Lori and brother Michael embraced the Bengali wedding
rituals and enthusiastically took part in all of them. There was a sumptuous multi-course
dinner served for the occasion.
Bride with her parents.
Jayinee with her mother Jaya. Now you know where she got her good looks.
With my sister Damayanti and her daughter Sharanya
With my brother Sambit
Sun Sep 28, 2019 morning we arranged ‘Gaye-holud’ (গায়ে হলুদ) for both Jayinee and Patrick. Gaye-holud is
a Bengali wedding ritual typically happens in the morning of the wedding day. It
takes place independently both at the bride’s and groom’s places. The women folks
of each family take turn to put turmeric paste on the bride and groom’s faces to
cleansing skin as well to purify mind and spirit. It was held at our home in
Morgan Hill, California for both Jayinee and Patrick. There were about 100
invitees who were served Bengali dishes for lunch.
For
the Gaye Holud a gate was setup in the style of Bengali Wedding pandal
with some hand-made motifs. Ideation by Jaya, design by Paramita, Implementation by Sambit, and erected by Rik and others.
The
wooden platforms (পিঁড়ি) with intricate paintings that the bride and
groom sit on. We'll see them again during the Bengali wedding ceremony
