Anaviv Catering,
an Oakland based boutique caterer, prepared and served the wonderful dinner. The
guests were served the entre’ of their choice at their tables. The available
entre’ were lamb chops, fish and a vegetarian dish.
The imposing columns of the old Federal Reserve building that is now Bently Reserve aka the Venue
The chandier
The tables are set and ready for the guests
Each of the elements on the table are selected by the bride and the groom
The wedding
favor at each place setting is an Indian stainless-steel tiffin carrier (lunch
box) with two containers filled with Indian sweets and savory. The story behind
the choice of this item goes back to Jayinee's fascination with Indian tiffin
carrier. She got one from India and Patrick uses it every day as lunch box.
They wanted to give the guests a practical useful item as 'thank you' gift.
Some decorative plants
The tables are now filled
Entry of the officiant, bridesmaids and groomsmen
Entry of the brothers - Michael and Rik
Grooms parents
The bride's parents entering to the song of 'Mere samne wali khiRki mein'
And the newly minted couple
Allie and Anthony's (friends of Jayinee and Patrick) song
Sudip and Srabasti (our family friends) duet - Ke prothom kachhe esechhe
Shane (Patrick’s father) speech
Lori (Patrick’s mother) speech
Jayanta's (our family friend) song - Ye shaam mastani
Jayinee is wearing the same Benarasi Saree that her mother wore in her own wedding
Jayinee
going back and forth between the venue and hotel for the last moment
details with her Sudip kaku (our family friend who has been involved in
the wedding planning and execution process from the day one)...
...and sometimes you have to run through the San Fracisco street on stilleto and saree to meet the schedule
Jayinee is putting her mother's gold ornaments under a multiple watchful eyes
Selfie time for my cousins Rinkoo and Anamitra with the groom
Harrigan men folks in traditional Bengali dress
The traditional Bengali bride
The Bengali Wedding Ceremony
Jaya inaugurated the Bengali ceremony by singing Sangachadwam
samvadadwam Rig Veda prayer along with Tagore’s interpretation by Anandaloke
Mangalaloke without any accompaniment. Though she is an accomplished singer, I
think, she surpassed many of her past performances due to the sheer significance
of the event.
Jaya inaugurates the Bengali Wedding Ceremony with song
The Bengali
Ceremony consisted of several rituals. The descriptions of each is provided in
the leaflet image that never been distributed to save some trees and avoid
littering.
The Bengali ceremony leaflet - front and back pages
The Bengali ceremony leaflet - inside page The paintings are by
activist and non-commercial artist Subhen Singha who first instilled in Jayinee
her love for painting
In this Bengali
Wedding I played multiple roles – the father of the bride (কন্যাকর্ত্তা) involved in the rituals, the priest (পুরোহিত) instructing Jayinee and Patrick what to do, the
barber (নাপিত)
who actually plays an important role in the Bengali wedding and as a
communicator and emcee to explain each of the rituals to the guests.
Giving the simple instruction to the guests - take part with boisterousness and enthusiasm
The groom comes with his family - Boragaman (বরাগমন)
The women folks from bride's home greet the groom by walking three times around him
Bride's mother blesses the groom - Baron (বরন)
The bride waiting for being carried by brother, cousins and friends
Bride is being carried to the Chhadnatala (ছাদনাতলা), the place where the marriage rituals take place
Bride is carried and rotated by the friends and
family around the groom 7 times - Saat Paak (সাত পাক)
who is taller the bride or the groom - মেয়েবড়নাছেলেবড়
Harrigan family is fully involved in the fun
The first eye contacts - Shubho Drishti (শুভ দৃষ্টি)
Exchange of garlands - Mala Badal (মালা বদল)
Adjusting the Topor (টোপর) - the special headdress made of pith
Around the fire bride
and groom together walk seven steps - Agni Sakshi and
Saptapadi (অগ্নি সাক্ষী ও সপ্তপদী). Due to restriction in making a fire, a single oil lamp was used
Pouring puffed rice to the fire - Kusumdinga (কুসুমডিঙ্গা)
The Bengali ritual was less traumatic than the traditional one...
...just by comparing looks of the couple from this 35 years old picture. Check out the saree worn by the brides in this and the above picture - they are the same.
য়তেদ হৃদয়ং তব
তদস্তু হৃদয়ং মম।
য়দিদং হৃদয়ং মম
তদস্তু হৃদয়ং তব।
This
heart of yours, May it be mine. This heart of mine, May it be yours.
The groom puts a
small amount of sindoor (red/ vermillion powder) on the part of the hair of the
bride - Sindoor-daan (সিঁদুর দান)
Asking for blessing from each of the parents - Ashirvad (আশীর্বাদ)
My final advice to Jayinee and Patrick by a Tagore's poem
We shall not create the heaven on earth Made of sappy sentimental songs. With the pain and sweetness of flower arrows we shall not make our wedding night, my love. We shall not beg feebly from the lady luck Because we are fearless by the sure knowledge that we are together.
